ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
“Think of it as putting the training wheels back on,” he told shareholders.
“Like we’re training for the next Football World Cup. By the time the next one rolls around, in like four years or so, we should be ready to go.”
Ralph Leyman, Director of Broadcasting and Content Aquisition at disgraced telecom, Optus, has today announced his intention to bid for the broadcasting rights to the Rugby World Cup – which kicks off in Japan next September.
“I think we’d be able to handle something of this size. Plus most people who’d be watching the Rugby World Cup would already have great internet and a postcode to match it. After making such a hash of the Soccer World Cup, we feel this is the right size challenge for us,” he said.
“We hope to learn from this experience as we look to redeem ourselves at the next Soccer World Cup. Something that the Socceroos need to understand, too. Their performance wasn’t brave or gallant. They didn’t even win a game. At least we broadcast a few games.”
Many in the broadcasting industry have welcomed the move, saying Optus has effectively removed their burden to show the rugby.
After their sports buying splurge this year, a seemingly nice albeit latently racist Network Seven content executive broke ranks this afternoon to spill the inside beans about the deal Optus is set to sign with World Rugby.
“We wanted it but yeah, the juice just wasn’t worth the squeeze, you know?” he said, scoffing down a ham cheese croissant as he FaceTimed our reporter.
“Optus has really done everyone else in the broadcast industry a huge favour by taking on the Rugby World Cup because it’s effectively dead air. It won’t be as bad as it would be if the games were in Europe but yeah – an overseas Rugby World Cup isn’t a ratings bonanza,”
“Most people who’d watch it are probably going to fly over for it anyway. They’d all be able to do it on points [laughs] Like me!”
The Seven employee then dropped his phone on the ground and said something racist.
More to come.
