EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact
It can now be confirmed that we are officially in winter, as the usual greetings of ‘hey!’ have been been replaced with some variation of ‘fuck it’s cold!’ or ‘fuck – it’s cold, isn’t it?”
Conveyed in person or over the phone, the entire nation is expected to confirm that ‘yes, it is cold!’ at least every frosty morning, or several times a day, for those who really can’t handle anything less than 18 degrees (Queenslanders).
For local woman Lana Eckleson, it’s alleged she’s mentioned how cold it is approximately 15 times this week and has complained about how hard it is to get out of bed in the morning, approximately ten times.
“IT’S SO FUCKING COLD”, she messaged her mate last night, who also confirmed it was, ‘FUCKING FREEZING.’
The nation’s dads have also agreed it’s a frosty one, but prefer to downplay the dramatics by simply stating the cold ‘has got some bite to it’, or ‘yeah, it’s a bit nippy.’
More to come.
