LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
A Channel Country farmer is doing it tough once again but it’s not drought, mice or milk cartels causing him grief this time.
On Tuesday morning, farmer Brenton Bryant entered the shed his granddad built with his own one and a half hands to discover a swarm of wedding planners inside.
“It scared the life out of me,” stated Bryant, now forced to hire an expensive demountable to keep his tools and gear in.
“They’d poured a tank of fuel down the drain and used the old tin to hold an arrangement of native flowers. There were fairy lights hanging from the roof and outside they had turned the tractor into a photobooth.”
“I honestly thought I might die. If they hadn’t used my shotties as a table runner things could have gone a lot worse.”
Unfortunately, Bryant is one of many Aussie farmers who have lost their shed to wedding planners as the post pandemic world agrees that it’s really cool to play country during the happiest day of your life.
While Bryant states it is unfortunate that he has lost access to his shed so 1000 odd couples can have a unique twist on the special day, in true Aussie battler spirit, he has managed to find the silver lining.
“I’m charging $40K a pop! And get this, that doesn’t even include anything, that’s just the venue and you set up all the shit yourself! They just pay it! They don’t even question it, that’s just how life is now! How good is that?”
MORE TO COME.
