“My Tiny Penis Grew Eight Full Inches After I Bought This Very Loud Motorbike”
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
There is a mirror opposite Ben Tyler's shower.
Each morning, the 32-year-old Gemini stands in that shower, with the warm water crashing into his...
Nation’s Females Blown Away By Revelations That Nightclub Promoters And DJs Are Grubs
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Females who enjoy dancing to electronic music in nightclubs around Australia are today rattled by revelations that they have been partying alongside degenerate...
Fairfax Media In Trouble As Even The Old White Men On The Board Get Redundancy Offers
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
To his shock this morning, an ageing Fairfax board member is staring down the barrel of having to own the same BMW X5...
Pauline Hanson Reportedly “Bored Out Of Her Mind” Waiting For Some Muslim Teenagers To Act Up
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Aside from threatening to block the coalition government's new plan for corporate tax cuts, One Nation leader Pauline Hanson says she is completely...
Doofer Forced To Take Up Nangs To Get Her Through Dry Season Shortage Of Shrooms
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact
With four months to go until the Australian magic mushroom season kicks off, local traffic controller Kelly Dowell (29) has managed to survive...
Johnny Depp Still A Cunt
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Even though it could be argued that he has had the last laugh after a long battle with the Australian establishment, it...
Trump To Provide Teachers With Diabetes To Prevent Diabetes Related Deaths At Schools
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
After meeting with sufferers and the families of those lost to America's type 2 diabetes epidemic, President Trump has called for 'something...
American Teacher Can’t Wait To Show Off Her Anti-Terror Muscle Memory On School Shooter
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
A lovely natured American woman who decided her one true calling was moulding the minds of innocent children through maths and literacy says...
Xenophon Secures SA Election By Drinking 8L Of Iced Coffee During Live Press Conference
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
SA Best leader Nick Xenophon has long used stunts as a part of his political career, and this time he seems to...
Boys Trip Organiser Unveils Custom Shirts That’ll Leave Bouncers With Great First Impressions
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
As the lads roll into the sinful, but somehow also steril, main drag of Surfer's Paradise, their stomachs bubble with excitement for...
