Bloke On $120k-A-Year Digging Holes For The NBN Hasn’t Had It This Good Since Pink Batts
After a few months spents working as a general unskilled labourer for the NBN Co, Brayden Kelly reckons times are good at the moment.
“It’s...
Toddler Won’t Shut Up About Cryptocurrency After Sucking On Yuppie Parent’s Keys
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
"Mummy, Bitcoin is going to the moon," he said.
"Stop investing in an overly regulated and stale commodity like blue-chip shares. Join the revolution."
In...
Melbournese Man In Brisbane Saddened He Can’t Buy A Book And A Coffee At 3AM
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Though he was born in the harbour capital during 'the 80s', a youngish Melbournese man has lashed out at the River City this morning...
Trump Secures The Crucial Reclusive-Music-Producers-That-Everyone-Is-Worried-About Vote
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
The iconic American rapper and music producer, Kanye West (40), has today left Democrats in a panic - after confirming rumours that President...
Meghan Markle Proud To Inspire And Give Hope To Millions Of Ginger Boys Around The World
KENT REGINALD | Culture | CONTACT
With the Royal Wedding just weeks away, soon-to-be Princess and current girl you recognise from those train station ads, Meghan Markle,...
Local Man Immediately Regrets Saying ‘Happy ANZAC Day’ To A Digger
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Mitchell Bauer (33) made an extra effort to show respect to those who have served for this country this morning.
After a quiet night...
30-Metre Banner Of Joseph Stalin Draped In Foyer Of ABC Sydney Raises Questions Of Leftie Bias
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Following the appearance of a 30 metre banner of communist icon, Joseph Stalin, accusations of bias have been levelled at the broadcaster -...
Optus Store Employee In Chesty Shirt Going A Bit Overboard With The Hair Product
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Phil Mason might not be the manager of the Optus store in the French Quarter, but he is a boss in his own...
Abbott Spends 2 Hours T-Rexing A Tweet About How Weed Goes Against Religion Or Some Shit
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Tony Abbott has spent the last four hours wrestling with how to best come out in opposition to the Greens new proposal...
Sydney Already Planning Marijuana Lock Out Zones And Restriction On Sale After 10PM
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Should the worst happen and recreational marijuana use becomes legal in Australia, the Harbour Capital has already taken precautionary...
