Rich Old Banker Copping Shit Because Of Deranged Beliefs Definitely AFL’s Biggest Cultural Issue
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
In case you have too much self-respect to read the Herald Sun or listen to Melbourne talkback radio, you might not know about the conservative media's newest martyr of cancel culture, Andrew Thorburn.
The Kiwi banking executive has sensationally quit his new role as chief executive officer of the Essendon FC, not even 24 hours after his appointment.
Thorburn's snap...
Paul Kent Doubles Down And Says Muhammad Ali Also Lacked Class And Acted Like A Teenager
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Despite claiming to oppose the growing 'woke' culture in Australian sport, NRL Fox League commentator Paul Kent is this week doing his very best impersonation of someone who likes to tell people what they can and can't say.
This comes as the heartbroken former Parramatta reserve rushes back to TV screens to ramp up his tall poppy syndrome before...
Visibly Hungover Paul Kent Disgusted By Youthful Polynesians Enjoying The Fruits Of Hard Work And Talent
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
This year's NRL Premiership winners are today under fire for not acting like they actually lost the Grand Final.
The cranky old men at Fox Sports are today blasting the Penrith Panthers for lacking “class and humility” as they squeeze out the last remaining culture wars clickbait from the 2022 season.
Penrith became just the second team in the NRL...
Liam Martin Politely Asks If Just One Luke Combs Song Can Be Added To Drill Rap Heavy Mad Monday Playlist
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | Contact
A JBL PartyBox is blasting in Mt Druitt this morning, as the Penrith Panthers kick off the first day of their Mad Monday celebrations.
Following their Grand Final win over the Parramatta Eels, it’s understood two buses of Penrith players and support staff are on route to an undisclosed location, to kickstart their...
Jarome Luai Kickstarts The Street Brumby And Leads Mt Druitt Victory Convoy To Panthers Leagues
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
The National Earthquake Alerts Centre has issued an alert this morning, after reports of a 8.5 magnitude quake was recorded on the fringes of Western Sydney.
Unrelated to the movement of tectonic plates, media on the ground are attributing the roar to the rumbling of victory, as Penrith Panthers five-eighth and proud St Marys local, Jarome Luai,...
Stress Of Grand Final Disaster Causes Peter Sterling’s Hair To Grow Back
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Parramatta Eels legend Peter Sterling is looking at the silver lining of tonight's game, he told The Advocate just moments ago.
"It's been stressful," he said.
"To say the very least."
The Penrith Panthers are just moments away from becoming the second team in the professional era to secure back-to-back premierships after the Roosters.
"Well look, my hair...
Swans Fans Start Looking For The Exit; Nearest Bin To Place Their Brand New Eels Hat
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
One of the Parramatta Eels' newest fans is already looking for the exit after scoring a few last-minute tickets to the NRL Grand Final as Penrith look to capitalise on a first-half walkover.
In addition, the unnamed fan is keeping an eye out for the nearest bin to place his brand new Eels hat so...
Brad Arthur Finally Gets His Hands On A VHS Player To Show His Team The Last Parra Premiership
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTThe old TV and VCR unit has been wheeled out at Bankwest this week as Arthur prepares to inspire the boys by showing them the last time Parra won a premiership.Opening the dusty old Parra trophy cabinet for the first time since someone removed that Jarryd Hayne portrait, Arthur found the taped VHS copy of the 1986 grand...
Gutho Arrives Late For Final Training Run After Staying Up All Night Watching Heartbreak High
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTTrouble is brewing in the Eels camp as captain Clinton ‘Gutho’ Gutherson has shown up late to a crucial pre-grand final training session. Rocking up two and half hours late to the training session, reports state the Eels skipper appeared unkempt and baggy-eyed as if he’d just been out for a big one.But it wasn’t nerves or the turps...
Young Child At Grand Final About To Learn Some New Fucken Ways Of Expressing Both Joy And Disappointment
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTIn a story we haven’t reported on in about 50 minutes, the NRL grand final between Penrith and Parramatta is kicking off this evening to a sold out crowd.One member of the sold out crowd is Parra fan Matilda Stone who at only five years old has never seen her team win a premiership, as is also the...
