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Apex Gang Members Released From Jail To Assist RSPCA In Saving Pets Locked In Hot Cars

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Bureau of Meteorology has said the temperature in Victoria went up from 30C to 31C between midnight and 1:30am this morning due to hot northerly winds. The entire state is currently sweltering through a heatwave, with the mercury tipped to soar to 44C in the north of the state today. In direct response to the unexpected heatwave, the...

Federal Government Compulsorily Acquires QLD Farming Land For Pheasant Hunting Weekends

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Queensland Government has condemned Federal Government plans to compulsorily acquire its properties for the construction of a giant pheasant hunting for Sydney and Melbourne MP's The Cabinet is aiming to take over a number of prime cattle properties around Shoalwater Bay, near Rockhampton in central Queensland, and introducing pheasants, to give our leaders a chance to unwind Pheasant shooting...

Mundine Pulls Out Of Fight After Being Called ‘UnAustralian’ By Daily Telegraph Readers

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Initial reports suggest that Anthony Mundine may be pulling out of his upcoming bout against Danny Green, after being called 'UnAustralian' by people who openly dislike Aboriginal and Muslim people - According to the Daily Telegraph. "We don't think there's any coming back from this" says one Daily Telegraph journalist. "He's been called 'UnAustralian' at least 40 times today...

“Aboriginals Need To Get Over What Happened” Says Bloke Preparing To Celebrate What Happened

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australia's Far-Right movement are starting to show signs of weariness with just days until January 26th, also known as Australia Day, a public holiday that has become the topic of fierce debate this time each year. After a relatively peaceful year, free of any redneck columns about whingeing Aboriginal people, the nation's rednecks are having...

Tracy Grimshaw Arrested For Cutting Brakes At Car Show In Effort To Stop Out-Of-Control Hoons

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Channel Nine's A Current Affair's Tracy Grimshaw has been apprehended by security this morning, after gatecrashing a Melbourne community event, armed with a pair of side cutters. The media personality's long-running feud with the nation's hoons reached boiling point today as she was spotted cutting the brakes of heavily modified cars at a suburban car...

“Let’s Take This Out Onto The Deck” Says Dad

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local dad, Grant Maryborough (56) hasn't had an alcoholic drink in a licensed venue since 2012. In the four years since then, every bit of socialising or unwinding has taken place on top of his deck. A slatted timber attachment to his post-war Queenslander style house. "It's all you could want, mate" he says. "We even extended...

Local bloke asks to ‘borrow a ciggie’ he has absolutely no intention of returning

17 January, 2017. 10:15 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact There's always one at each party - and last Saturday night, it was Ethan Whistler. Unfortunately for the West Betoota piano tuner, he couldn't stretch the weekly budget far enough to include his usual assorted box of cleanskin whites and a man-sized packet of Horizon Blues for the weekend. But recoil in fear...

Newcastle Steelworker Catches Himself Thinking About The Nineties Again

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Newcastle steelworker, Gary Johns (42), has found himself thinking about the best years of his life again. The nineties. This comes after a weekend of champagne rugby league, that saw the Newcastle Knights continue their Nineties-esque hot streak, putting twenty points on the St George-Illawarra Dragons to lock in 9 wins in a row. Knowing that he'll be in...

Nightclub Shut Down After Taking Too Long To Upload Previous Weekend’s Photos

A popular Brisbane club on Ann Street in Fortitude Valley has closed its doors after 14 years of operation after it failed to upload it’s New Years Eve photos before the following weekend. Scott, the 23 year old manager who is also an entrepreneur said “1 star Facebook reviews started coming in along with abusive messages and the crowds...

Study reveals Brisbanese people more likely to clean windows with the Courier-Mail than read it

6 January, 2017. 12:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A study commissioned by the CSIRO has found that most editions of the Courier-Mail sold in the Brisbane metro area are used to clean windows and barbeques. In addition to their use as a cleaning aid, the fledgeling newspaper is also more likely to be used to wrap up fish and chips...

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